You smug ol' bastard...

Oh my God--why didn't someone tell me I was shouldering the bike totally wrong!

Now I know I can't run--but seriously, it's 100x easier if you shoulder the bike correctly....!

I know all you cross hammerheads are sitting there now, chuckling to yourselves--bastards. It only took 3 embarrasing races for me to figure it out. Wow, I'm in college. Amazing what the brain can do when I use it.

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